"Love relationships aren't perfect... but we keep loving each other in spite of it all."
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Personal Essay: From "I Hate You" to "I Love You": The Comedy of Everyday Love
They say there's a thin line between love and hate. But what if it's more of a shuffle, complete with awkward steps and toe-stomping that ends in giggles? In the tiny skirmishes of cohabitation, we find fertile ground for that down-to-earth love that doesn't need an Instagram filter to affirm its existence. It's the love that bursts into laughter when the cheese is left on the counter or the toilet paper roll faces the wrong direction.
This day-to-day love isn’t fluent in perfectly rhymed poems; its poetry is scribbled on sticky notes that say "We need milk" and in text messages capped off with a smiley emoji after a "Did you leave the lights on again?". It's the love that finds sweetness in life's daily grind, that sees a declaration of affection in a pair of matched socks and a promise of forever in an "I forgive you" after a petty misdemeanor.
This love doesn't shy away from saying "I hate you" when the alarm blares and the other half of the bed has hogged all the blankets. Because hidden within every "I hate you" is a hug waiting to unfold, a caress that doesn't give up, and a shared smirk biding its time.
We love amidst the chaos of routine, amongst piled-up dishes and bills sticking to the fridge with their untimely magnetism. But it’s there, right in the thick of the mess, where love dons its superhero cape and comes to the rescue, reminding us that these are the anecdotes we’ll recount time and again, with a smile and the certainty that all of this is the essence of our shared narrative.
And so, when we trip over those shoes left in the hallway for the umpteenth time, we can't help but smile. Because those shoes, and the person who leaves them there, are a daily reminder that our heart has found its counterpart in this wild ride called life.
Yes, between the "I hate you" for not putting down the toilet seat and the "I love you" for the morning coffee lies a whole universe of little imperfections that, at the end of the day, we wouldn't do without. Because that's love: the art of finding the perfect balance between life's madness and the heart's peace, all while laughing along the way.
© Shoshan, 11/07/2023
Letter from the Heart: Love in Our Imperfections
Here I am, in front of a blank page, reminiscing about all those little everyday moments we share. I can’t help but laugh when I think of how you react when I leave the toilet seat up or stumble over your shoes in the hallway for the umpteenth time. It’s these trivial moments that make me realize just how deeply I’ve come to love you.
We are no secret keepers of perfection. Our love has turned out to be more practical than poetic, more daily than fairy-tale-like. But you know what? I wouldn’t exchange a single moment of exasperation for the calmest of romances. Because behind every heat-of-the-moment "I hate you," there’s an "I love you" waiting just on the other side of the smoke.
I adore the fact that we can be real with each other, that we don’t pretend our relationship is something out of a romantic novel. Our love is tangible, alive in debates over who should do the dishes or in the notes I leave you when I’ll be home late from work. And yet, at the end of the day, here we are, sharing a blanket, watching our favorite show, as if nothing else mattered.
This journey has taught me that love is about all those little flaws that, together, create something beautifully imperfect. It’s about loving each other even when one of us is being unbearable, about taking care of one another, and about laughing at ourselves.
So, my love, thank you. Thank you for every "I hate you" that actually means "you mean too much to me." Thank you for every giggle that follows a misunderstanding. Thank you for being you and for letting me be me. There’s no one else I’d rather trip up with in this messy dance of life.
With all my love,
"Love relationships aren't perfect... but we keep loving each other in spite of it all." © Shoshan